poop happens

coming out

2011-05-21T17:21:00.000-05:00

I just had to return to my blogging roots to ~~finish~~ carry on what I started many years ago as a ghost writer. That was about the time that things started getting difficult around here what with all the challenges that accompany living in a world where life's a bitch and then you marry one or die trying. As usual, I see the glass as half full, dung beetles and all. Scientists call this "too bad". Others say "and so it goes". I reckon it depends on who you're talking to. I wish I had the answer to all of the woes in today's world, but alas I'm just an overworked middle aged woman recovering from pneumonia. I could probably get worker's comp for that considering how much I sneeze and snot up there in my little corner of the sawmill, but that just adds insult to injury and Erin Brockovich isn't available to represent me so, there you go. Somebody's got to pay the utility bill.

It's a beautiful day in the hood, if I say so myself. The dogs have knocked themselves out running through the dirt and chasing their tails. Mama got her hair did way off schedule today and looked beautiful when I picked her up after. We made a stop at the chicken store to get daddy some lunch before heading toward the red log cabin. He could have had a pot pie but what the hay..he got fried chicken tenders instead. Tomorrow is church day so he'll be back up in the choir singing his little heart out while mama snoozes. He was raised up Baptist but converted to Methodist when he married her so that's where I was taught about the spirit and giving it room to work. That can just be such a hard thing at times.

I remember, once upon a time, having the audacity to stand up in a SS class attempting to talk about faith. I didn't have much of a clue about the biblical roots of that particular way of thinking at the time. I have learned since then that it's all about believing in things not seen but hoped for. Things like world peace and positive outcomes and new life. Today is supposedly the end of the world but I'm not really worried about it because I'm thinking that there's mansions in heaven and one of 'em has my name on it. A life well lived with good intentions is all it takes to be a sheep instead of a goat. If I'm wrong, I'll see ya'll in hell.

Here's a tip to everybody in flood zone: always apply mosquito repellent before venturing outside this year. And got the love of God, get everybody some heartworm meds before it's too late. I hear that the latest "war on" is all about bugs.

psssstttt

2009-02-28T15:27:00.001-06:00

Ya'll come visit!

slow boat to figi

2009-02-26T20:52:00.000-06:00

I think I've said just about all there is to say here ^j^

baptized by fire

2009-02-25T16:17:00.003-06:00

As if on cue for the season, our breakroom conversations at the sawmill have taken a distinct turn toward the spiritual side of things this week. Hours have been cut with all of the chaos involved therein, so the opportunity to sit and have a meaningful discussion is at a premium. We are Baptist/Methodist/Church of Christ/Pentecostal + many more variations of the Christian church. Our common demoninator is a belief in the eternal easter gift from Big Ernie that came in an tomb rather than a basket full of plastic eggs. I was fascinated to find that several of them had never heard of the ritual of getting ashed on this particular hump day following the big party on the Gulf Coast. Go figure.
* * *
My nephew, whom we shall discreetly call AT, is THE cutest baby I've ever laid eyes on, except for Babygirl, of course. Okay, we'll call it a tie. His long black hair stands straight up in the middle, mohawk style, giving the appearance of a troll doll in overalls with a great big smile, shining blue eyes and a side order of dimples. I miss him already.
* * *
I had every intention of listening to each and every word of President Obama's speech last night but fatigue won out when all the wannabes paraded out to be announced. I did get a kick when Ruth Ginsburg joined the party, looking wise as ever. Radicals just wear my old ass out, no matter which side they're on. Must be the hippie in me.
* * *
Daddy called for a Mylanta pickup this afternoon so I killed two birds with one stone and did a little grocery shopping. As I headed toward the dairy section I spotted an elderly woman intently studying the yogurt and sour cream with a big black smudge on her forehead. I recognized it immediately and realized once again that all you have to do is show up and let the big guy do the rest.

Keep the faith ^j^

little moments

2009-02-22T14:52:00.002-06:00

For as long as I live, I will never forget the look of pure bliss on my mother's face when she held her five month old grandson this morning for the first time. He and his mom and dad live in Virginia so this is the first chance they've had to travel to Tennessee with him. The surprised us by being at the restaurant where we showed up for late breakfast after early church. He got passed all around and there were smiles and giggles. Immediately when he landed in mom's lap, he laid his head on her shoulder like he knew he was with grandma at last. That's when my tears started streaming. The nice thing about being a middle aged gal is that you don't care what people think when you do that sort of thing. Heh.

Bubba just stopped by and we went out to bottle feed an orphan calf. The poor little guy held out for a bit while Bubba wrestled him to the ground but once he started bawling I stuck the bottle up in his mouth and away he went. Chow time for his first taste of milk in a month! Just call me cowgirl Poops.

BG and friend spent their morning going through old photos and making a collage and scrapbook for her dad. She handed me one that was taken twenty years ago, a much younger tanner blonder version of who I am today. Her comment was this: "Put this on your dresser and tell youself every day how beautiful you are."

Will do sugar. Will do.

^j^

muddy paws and double fried

2009-02-21T12:38:00.002-06:00

It is wet and cool and quite dreary here on Pecan Lane. Good day to stay inside and play listening to the rain fall on my newly planted salad. yum.yum. BG is off on a mission to find dresses for a friend's wedding and the other roommate is fixing stuff. Some kind dude at the auto parts place put my new wipers on in the drenching rain. Life is good.

Daddy and I met with his neurologist yesterday and there seemed to be not much change. It appears that having the burden of being "the one in charge" lifted from him has settled him down where he can enjoy life. There's always a blessing, if you look close enough. The new grandboy will pay his first visit in the next few days. Can ya'll just imagine what a hugfest that will be??

We watch the food channel almost 24/7 and experimented the other night with the double fried technique on 'taters. It was fantastic...lots of crunchies.

Talked with my old friend Hoss yesterday and he's still kicking. He kind of forgot who I was until I reminded him about us getting stuck in the mud and me leaving him there to die. *snort*

Peace out. Call 'yo momma. Keep the faith ^j^

my new tub

2009-02-19T14:57:00.002-06:00

healthcare for sale or rent

2009-02-18T18:12:00.003-06:00

When the word profit entered the picture, you can bet your sweet smartass that humanity went out the window. My career has seen three changes or ownership and I got screwed every time, believing that change is good. The truth is that the worker bee gets the short end of the stick. Loyalty matters not a whit during days when money and political power are on the line. Remember the late great Frist v Schiavo debate? That, my friends, is when I lost the faith in corporate America circa Poopie. So, I'm a slow learner. Sue me.

I chuckle sadly when I read the articles about how american families are going to have to adjust their lifestyles when there is war raging all over our great but fragile little world. People starving and such. Give back your damn luxury car and eat beenie weenies like the rest of us big.fat.stars. All I can say is that I admire the ones who give back, remembering from whence they came. Big Ernie likes that kind of stuff.

In case ya'll can't tell, I'm in a mood and there's no hormones involved whatsoever. I'm past all that, if you know what i mean. There's more of a turning over the tax tables kind of running-Stafford fit brewing and it won't be pretty when it breaks loose.

As Oprah would say "Watch out for the ugly cry."

Peace out.

^j^

ok, so the groundhog lied

2009-02-17T16:28:00.003-06:00

...like a rug. The wind is howling and there's snow in the forecast for this weekend. That's what I get for buying spinach, broccoli and romaine bedding plants and tilling a garden spot. That's okay, I can wait. Old Poops is patient to a fault.

Today has been a "day for the 'rents" for me. Mom's friend picked her up for lunch and bridge and Daddy and I went to Mary Lou's for greens. Then we picked her up from the bridge club and they both went to the dentist while I did the Kroger thing. It's all in the way you plan things. His appointment with the neurologist was re-scheduled for this Friday due to gale force wind and rain. Still got my list of questions tucked away.

We're in the process of dismantling the history that sits close to the barn. One of the buildings was surely an outhouse at one time, complete with screen window on the back. We're digging through the rubble looking for treasures and saving weathered wood for frames. Then, the big machine will dig a hole and bury the mess.

The other day a good friend shared something that gave me a big shot of faith, which is always appreciated. She told of her small group's discussion of the book of Esther and how I have been Mordecai to her over the years. As a very non-traditional Christian myself, that just gave me the warm fuzzies. Big Ernie must think I'm doing something right!

Ya'll keep warm and look for spring. I just KNOW it's out there somewhere ^j^

stimulate this

2009-02-16T21:06:00.003-06:00

Don't look now, but I think we've got a good start on a garden for 09.

the village idiot

2009-02-15T16:51:00.003-06:00

Poor Sammy D...he was just sitting there by the back porch and got hot bacon grease thrown on him after breakfast yesterday. BG cried and it was a lot of drama which I'm glad I missed. Ya'll know I don't like theatrics. When I got home from work his front half was still greasy so we headed to the tub with some Dawn and got the job done. Now tell me, isn't that the most handsome man you've ever seen?

Your Sunday is my Friday. I'll be busy sleeping in and playing so leave a message at the beep.

^j^

won't you be mine?

2009-02-14T15:51:00.002-06:00

Valentine's day just so happens to be my parents' anniversary. As of this one, they've been together for fifty five years, which means that I'll be 54 in a blink of the proverbial eye. But who's counting, right? Certainly not this smartass. I'm just thankful to be above ground for the moment. I'd hate to die a born again virgin.

The sawmill was hopping today with various sick and afflicted folks mixed in with the ones who have no insurance so they show up for every little thing. We are short staffed on weekends so it can get kind of hairy at times. After work I made a ~~crack~~ caffeine free diet coke delivery to Mom and found them visiting with Aunt Kathy and Susan, celebrating over a century of family and devotion. The couples like them who stay together through thick and thin are truly a dying breed. Kinda makes me sad sometimes.

The third roommate had a free day yesterday and gifted us with a Friday homecoming that included a clean house. Worth more than gold, ya'll. Taking the cue, me and the dogs wandered around the yard sniffing the aroma of spring and checking out the daffodil buds. Things are greening up quite nicely in the pasture and fields.

Sweet.

it's hard to be faith

2009-02-13T16:19:00.002-06:00

I haven't been up in the kudzu for months so BG and I decided to have some beers on the patio. Faith NEVER leaves unless she's following one of us out and just kinda cuts across to the by-pass where her favorite places are like UPS and Roadhawg Saloon. When we got home she was missing and the other (sometimes) roommate who fixes things was out looking for her. He came home empty handed.

All in the world I wanted to do was put on jammies and lay down to watch The Office but I drug my butt out to the Camry and drove up the road. Went to UPS first and some package loader over there told me he'd seen a dog in the ATT parking lot next door. It's like where they park their trucks and stuff. I eased over that way to find a huge chain link fence with a padlock between me and my beautiful brown eyed girl. There was a number posted for access, so I called and the guy was in Kentucky doing repair work from the ice storm. "Uh..my dog is locked in your lot" I said. Dude said he'd call a local to come out and free Faith from the compound. I parked in the drive and bent over to visit while we waited. She's not one to talk much unless you really work with her, but I heard some really heavy whining, if you know what I mean.

All's well that ends well I suppose..except for Faith. When I got home today, she was on a chain out front. Gotta learn somehow.

^j^

2009-02-12T14:53:00.003-06:00

I say it every year around this time. "This has been the looooongest winter ever!" And every year, I mean it. I don't like the heat'n'humidity around these parts, but the growing things concept always wins out over my total disgust with sweating through summer in Tennessee. We've survived two weeks of dead winter without heat and we saw some snow and ice. Let's get on with spring, dammmit.

I was visiting with my parents earlier today and we started talking about how they NEVER cussed around us. And bless our hearts, we picked up the naughty words anyway. Go figure. Anyways, imagine my surprise when I heard my dear Aunt Granny let fly with an F bomb one day at the hospital. Somebody was sick or dying or something and she was not patient with the elevator. From that day forward, I knew that we were soul sisters. Shit is my favorite word thanks to an upbringing with George Carlin as a hero. Thus, poop happens.

Love ya. Mean it.

^j^

blue on black

2009-02-11T18:43:00.004-06:00

Today's weather was not at all user-friendly for a smartass country girl on a mission to her father's neurologist with intent to discuss the ~~joys of~~ next stages of dementia. What with the drenching rain and high winds at sunrise, I decided the day job was a ~~better~~ safer choice for hump day. It is incredibly sad to see someone that you love lose their mind and soul. The blessing of the whole deal is that when you give it up and decide to go with the flow, everything works out as Big Ernie intended.

love has no pride

2009-02-10T17:40:00.003-06:00

Ever since the grueling two years spent in therapy, I've not had much of a problem being honest about things...sometimes to a fault. See: previous experiences with men. Finding our way as a "village" with my non-driving parents is an adjustment for all but has been a good experience thus far. Both of them seem to be relieved to have a safe way to get around when they need to, which isn't often. We had already taken over the shopping a few months ago so it's a natural progression of doing what needs to be done one day at a time. It is humbling to see how many folks adore my parents like we do and just want to give back to them in any little way that they can. Daddy and I will be going to see the neurologist tomorrow with an update and some questions. Here's where the pride part comes in..ya know? His is fragile and hanging by a thread right now but it's still there and it will be respected. That's how we roll in mia familia.

Over and out from Pecan Lane ^j^

sweet

2009-02-09T14:57:00.002-06:00

I had to snicker at this past due notice that the TV robbers sent after my bank kicked their butt and got my money back.

Yeah, I know. I can be a real bitch when you push me far enough.

Ya'll deal with it.

^j^

walking man

2009-02-08T15:43:00.003-06:00

After Daddy's wreck, I wasted no time in dialing up all interested parties with the news. "What can we do?" was their collective reply. That's faith in action, paid forward. No surprise there, just a great big shoutout to Big Ernie. Bubba took mom and dad to church and I picked them up for a late breakfast at Perkins. We'll visit the neurologist later in the week and get the truck fixed and take it day by day. Truth be told? It's a relief to have a plan and a village to help make it happen.

After breakfast we stopped by the store to get bananas and (caffeine free) diet coke. Mom and I sat in the car while Daddy stood in line behind some gal doing a months worth of shopping on a whim. From the corner of my left eye, a figure appeared shuffling slowly forward, not looking up. As he approached, I recognized him as a guy who graduated in my class. Homeless, he was walking the pavement looking for cigarette butts. His gaze never wavered. I got out and called his name but he never looked up. Just went on his journey north. When I got home, I called Yaya to find out what's up with him. She knows everything about everybody, ya know? A little bit of research confirmed that it was, in fact, him and that alcohol and drugs are the twin demons. I'll spare you our suppositions about why he was at that particular place because it ain't pretty.

Mama said " There's always somebody worse off than you."

Yep. And Amen ^j^

Walking Man - James Taylor

another twist in the road

2009-02-06T14:41:00.003-06:00

I got a call from my oldest brother yesterday informing me that the other shoe had dropped. He was out of town on business and Daddy called him and said he'd had a wreck. And left. And gone home. This is second big accident in less than a year crossing the busy by-pass. There will be no more because it's over for him and the truck except for piddling around the farm. Mom hasn't driven in several years due to her eyesight so they're soon to be ferried about by BG, myself and Bubba. I'm seriously considering asking sugardaddy for a cadillac so i can drive them in style to church and their appointments :) As fate would have it, my brother was in a meeting attended by Daddy's doc and he told him what was up. The state will take care of the rest.

There are still many folks in the area without power and the utility crews have filled up every hotel and restaurant for over a week. I stopped by the feed store on the way home to ~~buy some crack~~ get some gardening stuff and thistle seed. This is the same place that bought some of my pecans and they are as tickled as I am to see warmer weather and sunshine. Pecans are STILL falling.

I'm seriously considering a master's degree of some sort...not exactly sure what. It costs so much to get one, you have to weigh options carefully in this economy. Because I still have a job that pays decently, there's no aid. Not at all sure I want to go into debt again when I'm just crawling out.

BG has been in overdrive all week learning defensive postures to use with kickin'screamin'hateful kids at school. Extended time out is her second home! But you know what? She loves every minute of it and that gives me warm fuzzies.

Time to fetch a beer and commence to cleaning the house. I imagine there will be dancing as well.

Have a great weekend and ...well, you know.

^j^

good old butch

2009-02-04T18:39:00.001-06:00

My most recent hero...the propane guy.

from yesterday's walk in the yard

2009-02-02T15:12:00.004-06:00

old groupies never die

2009-01-31T14:27:00.005-06:00

...they just get their fat asses up and out of the flannel and go listen to some fine ass rock music. It was sort of a private concert for the Poops since NOT ONE other fan was there to watch. There were folks at the bar hittin' on each other but nobody to appreciate the talent. That's okay....it was fun for me and that's what I'm all about.

I met the drummer and bass player several years ago when they opened for Jimi Jamison at the late great Midnight Rodeo while Bubba was there. The other members are different and only add to the great mix of classic rock jamming. While a lot of folks were shaking their asses to AC/DC down in Memphis, I sat there and chair danced. Thanks a bunch Cruzer!

The sun is out and it's above 40. Life is definitely looking up.

^j^

friday already?

2009-01-30T17:05:00.002-06:00

Is it just me or has this been a mighty loooooong week? Many of my co-workers still have no power and the weariness shows in their eyes. According to bosslady's hubby who looks at these things, Missouri and Kentucky are a freakin' trainwreck. Thanks to the swift deposit of my income tax refund, there will be propane at our house this weekend. For the first time in two weeks! Staying warm isn't a problem...me not being able to play in the kitchen is a BIG one.

I splurged today on a tens unit for my aching shoulder. It's time to get it taken care of before the carpal tunnel thingy gets any worse. If I can't type, I can't work. And well...ya'll know. You gotta work.

My plans were to go see my favorite local rock band up the road tonight, but I'm already thinking that flannel and dogs sounds mighty good. My lazy twin will probably kick the wannabe party girl's fat ass.

Ya'll keep the faith.

^j^

i want to go to there

2009-01-29T21:00:00.005-06:00

The sun didn't even try to come out today.

strike two

2009-01-28T16:16:00.002-06:00

It took approximately thirty minutes to uncover the Camry this morning and thirty minutes to make the ten minute drive. Not bad considering I had power and many MANY others didn't. This one has been a monster for those in Arknasas, Kentucky and Missouri not to mention farther west. One of our co-workers is in Chicago training on a new piece of equipment and somebody talked to her yesterday. It was above zero so she was pretty happy.

One of the other guys up there has been looking at my Pap smears for a couple of years now, and he called today with good news. Completely normal. Several hours later yet another one told me that she had been praying for that. I love it when that happens, don't ya'll?

I managed to get some pretty pics today after it lightened up a bit, but the best will be tomorrow when the sun comes out. Maybe I'll see a rainbow in one of those crystals.

BG and I have been studying dental implants because she's overdue for one. She's been missing a front tooth since they all came in...one of those congenital things that my mother also had. When her braces came off, a bridge went in with the understanding that it wouldn't last much past 20. Which was right. It breaks about once a week. Time for a new tooth! We are toying with ideas about how to celebrate her graduation in May with a girl trip. For both of us, it's been way too long.

As my dear friend LPT says from East Tennessee....Happy Hump Day ^j^

strike one

2009-01-27T16:59:00.002-06:00

Driving to work this morning was like fairyland as the giant pecan trees draped themselves in ice. The back porch and windshield had to be de-iced but it was a safe drive in the rain to the sawmill and various destinations afterwards. One of those was to the OB/GYN for another dang PAP smear. Let's get this thing over with. If this one's not normal, it's time for the big H. I mean, it's not like I'm gonna have more kids or anything *snort* Did ya'll see those proud doctors out in California when that gal had EIGHT babies? Lordhavemercy and bless her heart. And amen, too.

Anyways, back at the ~~ranch~~ stirrups, we've discussed that since I had a LEAP that no endocervical cells had been noted by the pathologist, meaning that after the procedure the cervical juncture changed. While the specimens are adequate, they don't really represent the "big picture". I can bet you a million bucks dude got there today. I thought I was gonna cry for mommy. And guess what? I lost eleven pounds and didn't do anything different except pick up a thousand pounds of pecans. Ain't life grand? Sometimes I truly understand why my boss won't go.

Tomorrow morning promises to be not quite as lucky as this one, I'm afraid. I've already lined up a ride with my brother because frankly, if I'm gonna die on the road it might as well be with him ^j^

Ya'll go get some rock salt, right now. Tell 'em Poopie sent ya.

hunker down

2009-01-26T12:45:00.002-06:00

There's a big fat honkin' ice storm headed our way so all the 'burgers are scurrying around to get bread and milk and pizza rolls for the kids who won't go to school tomorrow. Back in the day, I'd have to round up daycare for BG when that happened...usually her MeMaw and G'daddy would keep her. Usually there wasn't enough slippery stuff to make a difference except on county roads but will buses running, everybody got a snow day.

After sleeping in this morning, I went down to visit Mom and found Bubba there firing up the generator for a test "just in case." After he left she and I talked about this and that sharing a few laughs and some tears. My cellphone rang and I answered to a sweet little voice that I recognized telling me that my bank had received a credit to my account for the great DTV robbery. Three.months.later. Knowing the thieving ways of DirecTV, I'm sure they didn't pitch in. Whoever saw fit to give a poor girl a break is truly appreciated. Thank you bank ladies!

This weekend at the sawmill was one of those where I found myself shaking my head and asking "WTF am I doing here?" I'll spare you the details. Just know that today off and some beer will cure all until tomorrow rolls around. A big shout out to my backup in Memphis who cheerily took the early morning crisis call.

The one sure way to ward off bad weather is to be prepared so I stopped off at the store to get a box for my windshield and some de-icer. Ha...take that, winter!! The horse is fed, the sun is out and I'm kozy with kerosene.

Must be the calm BEFORE.

^j^

the one that always makes me cry

2009-01-25T19:38:00.001-06:00

does that come in bold print?

2009-01-24T19:00:00.003-06:00

Never in a brazillion years would I have imagined that the particular set of circumstances in which I find myself would be my middle age. You know....when you're a kid or a teenager or even thirtysomething, you just don't think about being a grownup and not having it all together in a neat little pile that you can gaze at lovingly and chat about things back in the day. Life just doesn't work that way.

Most folks my age are caught between semi supporting kids in their twenties and trying to figure out how to manage end-of-life care for their aging parents. The ones who never grew up are still coasting along as if life owes them a good time. Sometimes I wish I were one of those people who get taken care of because they can't do any better. Sometimes I wish I was still the baby.

Like Sam.

friday night live

2009-01-23T19:13:00.000-06:00

magical jolts

2009-01-22T12:18:00.002-06:00

I wore a tens unit on my shoulders for eight hours on Tuesday at full throttle, if that tells you anything about how tied up in a knot I was. Yesterday I was a bit sore. Today I feel like I've been beat about the head and shoulders. But it's RELAXED! Maybe that will hold me 'til I can get a massage.

Off yesterday and today, I've been piddling and cleaning and doing whatever I feel like doing and it's absolutely the most heavenly feeling. Things have warmed up a bit so the doors are open, airing out the kerosene fumes from the deep freeze days. There are STILL people coming out on the lane to pick up pecans. That..is unheard of in January. Usually by this time the squirrels and crows have picked off whatever was left.

My mom has macular degeneration and doesn't see well. The state has an agency that serves the blind and helps them with cool toys for the sight impaired. Her latest buy was a big button phone with memory on it. I sat in the floor with she and Daddy yesterday reading the instructions on how to store numbers while they shouted them out to me from cell phones and paper scraps. I guess you had to be there, but it was freakin' hilarious! Daddy said the guy who shoots crows would be around soon to get rid of their ornery birdie butts.

Miss Kitty, the "special" one, is still circling. When I first stated feeding her I gave her the good stuff...canned Nine Lives. Then BG got some four for a buck kind at the dollar store. When we ran out of that, I gave her the gourmet treat again and she wouldn't eat! Seems her delicate taste buds prefer the cheap stuff. Whatever works, I say.

I haven't been around to visit, and that must change! Expect me to come calling in the near future.

^j^

true story

2009-01-20T16:59:00.002-06:00

I stood in the huddle gathered in our waiting room today, eyes glued on the TV as we witnessed the inauguration of President Obama. Patients drifted in and watched with us in between IDs and blood drawing. BG and her co-workers watched in spurts today while herding elementary school kids. I think it'll kinda be like "remember where you were when...." with this particular day in political history.

One of my co-workers said she thought it was silly to make such a big deal about him being the "first black president." There are two lovely African American ladies who work as part of our team. Miss Anita is one of them. We stood there watching the babygirl play and chuckling about how they will do that. She's got two little grandgirls herself. I asked her if she ever thought she'd see the day. She was quiet for a minute, but explained the silence vividly. " Me..I've never really seen true hardship, but my mama sure did."

^j^

i am an american

2009-01-19T15:41:00.005-06:00

Hopefully today was the last round of the great Bush vs Obama debate up at the sawmill. A mere three of us have dared over the years to question the legitimacy of Bush's decisions. For that, our patrotism has been questioned and our mamas' lineage made light of. One friend, who is a real Bushie, told me today that she can't help it...she "still thinks he's a nice man." I told her that I didn't blame him personally for all that has happened, though a lot of people have. I just believe that he went into the whole thing naiive as a schoolgirl and was counseled on some serious issues by those with everything to gain. And it wasn't we the people. Hey, it happens in real life too.

Senator Obama may find himself in that situation as well. Hopefully, he will be wise enough to see through those situations and do what is right for all Americans.....black, white, hispanic and every other citizen of the country that he leads. It is a serious responsibility to guide a country as complex as ours in this day and time. Division of the people who live here based on racial or partisan lines will do nothing but hurt us all in the long run. I did not vote for Obama, but I will support him until he gives me reason not to. I'm kind of Pollyanna like that.

If you will remember back over the years, the whole financial mess started wayyyyyyyy before Dubya stepped foot into the White House. A trade deficeit with China has been chasing us like a hungry wolf and damaged the infrastructure of industry in the US. We grabbed onto the easy credit back in the day and are surprised that the whole house of cards falls.

One of the most intelligent things that I've heard spoken came from Arianna Huffington on TV today. She embraced the ideal of having a strong grandmotherly presence in the White House as a model for the rest of us to bond as families, something that has gone by the wayside in our hurry hurry atmosphere and long distances. As a strong proponent of hospice care, I can tell you there was no shortage before the 1950s of loving caring folk to heal the sick and minister to the dying. Everybody lived together. They dealt with it.

I hate pollution and global warming ( yes, i believe it's real ) I abhor industrial waste that is killing the natural gifts that are our rivers and wildlife. And I cringe at the thought of a CEO of ANY big corporation making enough money to cure cancer. I believe that insurance companies have each and every one of by the gonads and won't let go until forced by someone in authority. The healthcare industry in this country is fractured and inefficient, mainly because so much of it is focused on the almighty dollar. There's got to be a better way to manage distribution of such a basic human right.

Peace out ya'll ^j^

the big chill thaw

2009-01-18T14:11:00.003-06:00

To all you folks who live in Minnesota and do that freezing thing for three months, bless ya'lls hearts. We only had three days of it and managed to use every last vapor of propane that remained in the tank. Never fear, though. BG's boyscout friend hauled a kerosene heater out of the basement and fired it up, complete with a pan of water on top. Today it is warm enough to cook on the grill outside, so that is what's happening as we speak.

This has been a most excellent weekend for me. Sleep, long and hard. Piddle 'n play. Try to get my shit together a bit. I haven't visited the people who live in my computer for a long long time and that's okay because the shoulder is less painful. The better to tap out lab results for healthcare clients, no?

No matter what your political affiliation, this week promises to be a milestone in American history. To all of you who can't go with the flow, I say "Deal with it." There are so many great things about this country and its' citizens that I get literally sick listening to partisan bickering and the lack of concern for who we are as individuals.

Have a great week....and keep the faith ^j^

the new normal

2009-01-15T16:41:00.003-06:00

It's odd how it hit me with a ton of bricks yesterday how much I've missed having a roommate with hours that complement mine. For three years now it's been tippy toe land around here while my BG tried to catch a nap between work and school. Her internship is day!!! shift at a local elementary school and she already loves it, week one not complete. We actually met each other in the kitchen this morning for toast and chat. The noisy hairdryer buzzes in the morning instead of after I've gone to bed with the dogs. Sweet.

Bubba and I went riding in Daddy's truck yesterday to check on the cows before the cold hit today. They were still running around playing like kids in the ditches then. I imagine they're hunkering down right about now, snuggling up to mama cow's rump away from the wind. Old Mr. Bull gets out to play amongst them in about a week so he's getting kind of impatient. Especially when I took his picture and didn't put anything in the trough.

I'm off for three...the shoulder is still tight and painful. Ya'll grab something warm and hang on. This too shall pass.

^j^

like a rock

2009-01-13T17:50:00.003-06:00

My left shoulder, that is. It has been a huge mass of balled up muscle lesions off and on since I was in my twenties. When the stress of life gets really out of control, it kinda hurts. Like a LOT. Physical therapy usually does the trick, but that ain't in the budget. Neither is a massage. Just my typical poopie luck.

I catch myself in a race many days, putting out fires at home and at work with little thought to how that adrenaline is zapping my body. Hey...it keeps me going, okay? I spend all day at a computer screen only to face one at night just to keep me company. Well, it used to be that way. A couple of months ago I moved it from my bedroom to the dining room so that BG and I can share and not wake the mom up on precious days off. It was the best thing I ever did. Out of sight and out of mind. Now I've got the TV all up in there :)

Until that tingling in the left hand stops? It's time to take a break from the keyboard. I'll keep you posted.

^j^

^j^

lenten delight

2009-01-10T15:25:00.002-06:00

Most Christians think of Lent as a period of giving things up in preparation for the big celebration. Most of the time they are important things that we love dearly and just have to SEE if we can survive without. I mean, after all. Look at what he did for us. This year my letting go will be of a relationship that is unpredictable in a scary sort of way. Not abusive, but definitely one sided. See you on the other side of Easter, dude.

The funeral was a warm mixture of hugs and celebration for a life well lived. I sat with Daddy and his sisters and cousins, surrounded by my heritage as they lay another one of theirs to rest. I'm such a camera hound, I always carry mine with me so I couldn't pass on the photo op. Ain't they a happy looking bunch?

Ya'll try to stay warm. In my experience having a couple or three dogs will do the trick.

^j^

cousins and bird

2009-01-09T14:34:00.002-06:00

Back when we were kids, it was nothing for every single one of my Daddy's family to pack up the kids and fried chicken and head to Mississippi for the yearly family reunion. Daddy had three older sisters who took care of him when he broke both arms as a boy when he fell out of the hay loft. I can so see them wiping his little man behind and shushing him the whole time! They lived on a pice of land where his Daddy farmed and the rest of them helped during and after the Great Depression. I'm talking hard times like nobody with an IPod ever thought about seeing. Every time I start feeling sorry for not having the money to get something, I try to remember that part of my history and be thankful.

Over the years the kids grew and didn't really have the desire to attend, so it turned into a gathering of cousins. They picked different places and came together every now and then to catch up. I've met many of them over the years though I coldn't tell you who all the seconds and thirds are.

Cousin Earl died this week after a long illness. His daughter Sandy is one third that I have stayed in touch with and she is home from West Virginia. Mom and Daddy and I are hooking up tomorrow for the funeral. Is it just me, or does it seem like more and more time is spent in the undertaker's parlor these days. I've gotta hand it to Yaya...she never misses a visitation if she can help it. I admire her for that...think Stephanie Plum's Grandma Mazur with high heels and lipstick. I don't do well in "stand in long lines and make small talk" situations, so I usually attend the service or show up at the graveside.

There is nothing more somber than standing under a funeral tent with an umbrella close by during a graveside service. The burial for my boss/friend's daddy was just such an occasion. Looked just like a freakin' Alfred Hitchcock movie. But sometimes I think that attending a burial on a pleasant day is worse because the whole world seems to be going on normally while the little congregation says good-bye to a loved one. Tomorrow is forecast to be cool and rainy.

I also believe that there is a lesson in each experience and relationship. Sometimes you don't see it until much later, which is kind of the case here. As hard as it is to deal with the grief that surrounds death, it is inevitable and the best thing that can be achieved is a big fat group hug for those who are hurting. A lot of my dearest friendships have been cemented in this way. When you go to the dang cemetary with somebody, you love 'em with all your heart.

Stay warm. Hug your pets. Kiss the wind.

Keep the faith ^j^

window of opportunity

2009-01-08T18:54:00.002-06:00

I don't know ya'll, but I think I'm in total mind love with the new guy in charge of ~~fixing~~ taking a big fat Quixote style jab at the clusterf**k that is our healthcare delivery system. Way too much of it is about money with compassion and empathy a mere dab of gravy on the top of corporate America's pile of mashed 'taters. I speak from experience. Tons of it.

From Halloween 'til Easter, blood banks have to scurry just to keep their shelves halfway stocked with red cells or platelets from those who take the time out of the perpetual rat race to help make a life easier. My good friend Fennie was one of those who outlived sickle cell anemia thanks to regular transfusions. She died about three years ago after giving her testimony at a dinner for donors. When I first met her, she was gruff and tough but I wouldn't accept that. We became friends in spite of it and I still miss her, yellow eyes and all.

Things get broken when government is too big for its' britches. That is what has happened to us here in the US. Of course the Corey B. Trotz's of the world haven't helped matters. When a desire to help people turns into a race to see who can make the most money, dignity gets lost in the process.

I just pray that somebody with faith is minding the store.

^j^

fixer upper

2009-01-07T19:27:00.003-06:00

In real estate lingo, that's the catch phrase that would describe my house. Built in 1918 during the boom times of WWI it was home to some of those who oversaw the Ferguson Farm operation. As the story goes, Dr. Ferguson made a brazillion bucks selling raincoats for soldiers and purchased the property with his fortune. The only other house on our lane was built around that time as well. My parents live in a log cabin that was originally a hunting lodge for visitors of the family,, circa 1940ish.

Back in the day there was a huge dairy barn that still stands with silos saluting proudly on one end. There were hogs, chickens, cattle and asparagus as a cash crop. Orchards galore. A schoolhouse chock full of children who would rather be out playing by the river than dragging squeaky chalk over their black boards, spelling out their ABCs carefully so that some spinster teacher could pass by and give the work an obligatory glance.

Over our years here as a family, BG and I have often dreamed about the possibilities for such a fine old residence. When she was a teenager all she wanted was a room in the attic complete with a 2nd bathroom. Never happened. Most of her memories were made in the basement where the colored monikers of teenaged love still adorn the steps and walls. Kate loves Josh! Addie was here :) Melissa. Jon. Woody, et al. What was I thinking????????? My most vivid basement memory is the time when Chris M smacked his forehead wide open when he ran up the stairs and failed to duck. His bad. Lots of blood. Yet he's alive and well to this day. Just call me mother-of the-year, umkay?

We have paint and tile on the walls and nice flooring on the main level. The few tedious details that remain are not essential, but will get done eventually when the spirit moves. And it will, as it always does.

^j^

faith goes bar hopping

2009-01-05T12:37:00.003-06:00

If you've been a reader here for any length of time you have read of the multiple adventures that my chocolate lab Faith has experienced. I've bailed her out of the humane society three times at fifty bucks a shot and picked her up at various locations around the county where kind folks pick her up and call the vet's office for my number. Most of the time when she feels the wanderlust, she ends up at the UPS hub across the highway. I guess that got boring because today's call came from the nearby biker bar.

Road Hawg Saloon sits across the by-pass from the road to my house and opened in October of last year. I went by on opening night and didn't see anybody I knew so I moved on down the road toward home. Today was my first visit since then when I went to fetch my pretty girl from inside. Her keeper was a lovely young lady named Lindsay wearing her leather chaps and tending to the quiet that is a bar at noon. She showed me around and I was impressed with the progress...looks very nice. The sign out front advertises BABES!BIKES!BEER!and she is sure a babe to take care of Faith on her latest excursion. A big shout out to the owner too, for bringing her in from the freezing rain and sleet. That fellow gets a pecan pie.

It is cold and wet and I'm in for the day. Life is good.

^j^

bloom where you're planted

2009-01-03T16:32:00.004-06:00

I did that little diddy up in counted crossstich back when I could see well enough to find the holes in #18 aida wielding a sharp instrument. My mama still has it displayed proudly at home in the red log cabin. She is responsible for my artistic side, always nurturing my spirit with regular doses of Mary Engelbreit crack for the weary smartass country gal soul. If I ever have to buy my own calendar I'll pitch a fit like ya'll ain't EVER seen outside of a NASCAR track. I'm low maintenance to a point, but gah.

BG has a week off from real life to hang out here at the house and bond. This? Is a very good thing, my friends. Enough said.

I've come to the gradual realization that I do have some talents and that I should focus more on them than the mundane money making things that keep the lights burning and buy cat food. And dog food. And people food! That is why you will find me off and on in the basement straightening up ~~shit~~ stuff and making general areas for things like woodworking and ~~growin' shit~~ planting. It will be my place to play. I'm kind of liking that idea. A big shout out to my sis-in-law for planting the seed that sprouted that particular frame of mind. And to the smartass photographer, of course. And Idgie :)

I was in a total funk all day after 72 hours of lounging and having to get up off of my fat ass to run the circles on that concrete floor at the sawmill. The most annoying thing is that tube system that delivers specimens from the ER to ~~eager phlebotomists~~ whomever is closest or outwaits everybody else. There are so many alarms in that place you have to follow the beep to find out what's not working right. Enough about that. It gets tiresome.

I'm seriously considering turning on the AC because it's sort of warm and humid up in here at the moment. Not good for January in Tennessee. That's where tornadoes come from.

Please ignore the cobwebs in the pics and pretend that I've already hauled the Rainbo downstairs to suck all the dust up. I know it's a stretch, but humor me, okay?

Peace out kids.

^j^

resolution

2008-12-31T14:42:00.002-06:00

New Year's Eve finds me at home with the critters deep cleaning the house because, frankly, I can't stand it anymore. I'm not a neat freak or anything but I do like to be able to find something when I need it. Like the remote, for instance. I couldn't find it for three whole days until I dug down to the bottom of the dirty clothes laying in front of the washer. Don't ask me...I guess it was in the sheets!

This just about sums up the last six weeks of my life, living and breathing pecan season '08 up close and personal. I've taken three loads down to these folks to sell and made some pocket money. I'm also in much better shape physically than I was in October. Free money and good exercise. Can't beat that with a stick. I sat in a line of cars ten deep waiting to unload in the back today and finally pulled out and got a handtruck to haul them through the front door. Some nice fellow got out of his car and helped me get 'em stacked so they would travel. His mama told him to :)

Remember how I caught the pasture on fire a few years ago while burning off the asparagus bed? Well, Daddy did the same thing to his YARD yesterday while burning some boxes. Back in the day country folks did that on purpose so it would come back all green and even in the spring. We shall see if that holds true!

I had several invitations to attend get togethers this evening and it looks like I'm gonna pass on all of them. It just feels so good to have time to burn and be at home. Do ya'll know what I mean? I reckon I'll blow a kiss to Ryan Seacrest at midnight if I'm still awake.

The new year will be a big one for us. BG will graduate in May and things will change a lot then. We have been soldiers in the same tent through this ordeal and it will be bittersweet when it is over. Already, we are becoming fondly used to the lightening of the load afforded by her quitting the 3rd shift job. She can sleep at night and I can make noise when I want to. Win, win situation.

I wish for you and yours, all of the best that life has to offer in 2009. There will be pain and tragedy as well, but friendship makes it all bearable and turns bad things into blessings.

Keep the faith ^j^

newsflash!

2008-12-30T17:08:00.002-06:00

According to ex-Bush aides it was all over but the crying after Katrina for Dubya's political career. In the words of a ten year old " Well,like,DUH!" These bozos knew what was happening at the time and chose to ride the train that was presently big dog on the track. Now that it's down to the nut cuttin', they're telling all. Where were they back in '05 when the rest of us were raising nine kinds of hell? Oh, yeah. They were busy making history. My bad.

That sound you hear is a huge sigh of relief to be off work for 3 days of whatever looks good. You know how sometimes when the computer won't work unless you do a hard reboot? Uh..yeah. That's what my body feels like right now. This too shall pass.

^j^

2008-12-29T18:23:00.000-06:00

follow that star

2008-12-28T15:03:00.002-06:00

Back in my early blogging days, there was this guy in Dallas who moved to Colorado and that was his blog persona...FTS. I had forgotten about him until I started thinking about Epiphany and all of the star following that is a part of the days between Christmas and the time that the wise guys finally got to where they were going. It's only twelve on the calendar....in all likelihood it was months or years before they caught up to baby Jesus. I never knew there was such a chunk of time in the year of the Christian church until I heard a sermon preached on it one Sunday night in the chapel of the place that raised me up right. Ever since then, Epiphany has been as much a part of my holiday season as Advent.

I had a slow day at the sawmill on Christmas, with home cooked breakfast from the fam delivered to the doorstep right in time for lunch. I hooked up with them after work and we exchanged gifts and visited a bit. Totally laid back and unorganized, which is my style. Mom and Daddy went to church on Christmas Eve to witness the parade of miniature Marys, Josephs and assorted other nativity characters head toward the altar prior to communion. I am still picking up pecans from under their trees, by the way. Maybe the profit will offset the thieving ways of DirecTV. No...I haven't forgotten, ya'll. My attorney will be in touch.

My sole involvement in the big wedding this weekend has been talking my friend Claudia from Knoxville and back through the boring part of I-40 between Jackson and Nashville. She's counting the miles until she gets back to her little buddy Kyle. Meanwhile the crack head roaddog is over in Chattanooga having a beer with Peggy. What a small state this is!

Miss Kitty seems to have turned a corner, though I'm not a vet or anything. She eats now and talks and purrs, but doesn't like to drink much and still walks in circles around the house. BG and BF have nicknamed her "Circle K." She's got a long way to go before she can laze on Daddy's porch and eat dry cat food, I'm just saying. Looks like I've got another mouth to feed. *yay*

It has been a splendid day with a bit of a chill but nothing like what we've already seen this month. Yesterday? Hmmm...around 72ish. It was kind of eerie crawling around on hands and knees picking up nuts with a warm wind whipping the old hairdo right straight up into the air. The extended forecast looks good for a wrap on Pecan Season '08 over the next few days.

Two days to work, then three to play.

^j^

miss kitty

2008-12-24T15:21:00.004-06:00

For any of ya'll who don't believe in Christmas miracles, let me tell you about how that beautiful cat up there came to my house.

Yaya loves animals like I do...it's a firm plank in our friendship platform. A few weeks ago she was heading out to work and spotted something on the side of the busy highway that leads to town. Soon she realized it was a cat in distress so she stopped to check things out. This poor baby was so cold that several hours later the vet couldn't get her to register a temp until she was warmed up by them. Yaya told me about it, adding that she was late to work because of taking the time to stop and pick her up. Miss Kitty spent several hours in her office before she made it to the vet. She and one of her co-workers vowed to split the cost of saving her or puttin' her down, whichever seemed best.

Mama and Daddy adopted a tomcat earlier this year when he wandered into the bushes next to the house. They fed him on the porch and he knew where to get not hungry. But, toms will be toms and he went off chasing tail like they do so the porch was empty again. I don't think he ever had a name, but they sure did miss him. Earlier today I was down there introducing Miss Kitty to them who will be theirs when she's recovered from her hard times. We were thinking of a name, and Gunsmoke was blaring on the TV while she snuggled in Mama's lap. The rest? Is history.

Miss Kitty has a long road to recovery. She is presently walking crop circles through all the rooms in the house doing physical therapy. She slides sideways and flops over sometimes. That's when the door facing comes in handy :)

Peace and love to you and yours.

Keep the faith ^j^

taking the high road

2008-12-23T15:56:00.003-06:00

I think I mentioned that the competition was "take no prisoners" up at the sawmill for decorating departments and parade floats. I use the term parade loosely because it seems there was a traffic jam when it came time to change floors. The employees loved it....the patients were nicely surprised. I have seen team work going on inside of our ranks where I never thought it possible just because of things like this. After the sale, we all kind of gave up the ghost and soldiered on through a long tough transition. Let's hear it for those who play just for the fun of it without expecting to win.

I am officially on Christmas vacation which lasts until Thursday at 6AM. If I get up at the usual time I just might catch the big fat ass red guy crawling out the door. Just for Hoss' sake, I hope that he doesn't show any buttcrack. My kitchen table is covered with prints and mats and frames and I am more content with that than any sort of vacation destination. My family is close by and the ice has stopped pelting us. All is well^j^

some things never change

2008-12-22T15:40:00.003-06:00

Every year around December 22nd, the error of my procrastinating ways comes around to bitch slap me into the realization that Christmas is three days away. At this point, my "whatever" attitude toward those who shop the sales and have the whole event in the can by mid-October morphs into a deep and abiding respect for organized people and how easy their lives seem to be. Somehow, in spite of genetic predisposition toward organized living, my youngest brother and I managed to become two of the most haphazardly happy ~~slobs~~ people in the world. Bubba, the middle one, can put his finger on the very first dollar that he ever made and tell you where it's been since he moved out of my parents' house. I guess the organized gene is a recessive one and I was lucky enough to get the homozygous dose.

My work on the house has been a never ending saga that began in earnest just a few short years ago and has stopped and started a million times, at least. It is still not done, though it could have been. However, I am traveling the slow road to gettin' my shit together which involves hours spent examining the contents of boxes and deciding on keepers. That's why the molding in the bathroom is still unpainted and the cabinets doorless. There are treasures that need to be separated and wrapped in tissue for the little girl who received them, now a woman about to begin life on her own. I remember when my mother packed up the contents of my room and sent it to my new apartment for me to mull over while she enjoyed the much needed space. It was kind of the beginning of that nagging feeling that we are all somewhere on the road to becoming orphans. And that? Just made me plain old scared.

My big dreams about making homemade gifts has turned into a mad dash to the photo center to pick up prints amongst the holidy crowds. WHY did I not do that a month ago? I've got two double chocolate pound cakes in the oven because, well, some things are traditional and folks come to expect them...like the crew up at the Plaza Food Store where I shop every day, at least once a day. Let's just say if I didn't turn up with the cake, they wouldn't believe in the spirit of Christmas.

And NO. Those prints aren't framed yet but they will be. I'll be at the sawmill on Christmas Day and the day after. So much for the great sales! That's okay. I wouldn't have braved it anyway. Right now the very best thing Santa could bring me is a day to do nothing but lay in the bed with a book and my dogs.

Maybe next year.

Merry Christmas to all of you who drop by here to visit or comment or just lurk. I pray that your holiday time with family and friends is filled with the spirit of love and joy that this season represents.

^j^

2008-12-21T17:35:00.000-06:00

wedding crashers planners

2008-12-19T19:11:00.002-06:00

Ya'll don't be surprised if the devil himself ice skates on December 20, 2008 because I never thought I'd see the day that redneck friend let us give her a hug, much less get married to the handsome man who's been dying for the honor to become her husband since back in the day when we all first met up in the kudzu one afternoon. She's the one with the smirk.

I don't want to brag or anything but dang, we've done a good job of decorating the reception hall. Christmas is easy what with all the free stuff from nature to lay on the tables for a day. I've still got to do some cooking but that's my chance to unwind. I've ironed tablecloths and am about to broil some bbq bacon wrapped liver delights. Love you guys. Really ^j^

I'm sitting here listening to, of all things, classical music. It's a Christmas thing to me, redneck that I am the rest of the calendar year. I suppose that's the influence of my aunt and uncle and their love for the art of musical therapy for the six year old country girl soul. Mama and Daddy got me delivered for early morning lessons all through grade school, then I switched to Mrs. Fisher as an instructor up in her house on Sampson. She was also a French teacher, by the way.

Thank you for the prayers. I can tell a big difference in my outlook on life and love and rock'n'roll. All I'm saying, is that me and the babygirl see the light at the end of the tunnel, and together? We are a force to be reckoned with.

^j^

snow day

2008-12-16T18:47:00.000-06:00

2008-12-14T08:00:00.000-06:00

Merry Christmas, my friends ^j^

unwinding

2008-12-13T17:33:00.002-06:00

It has been a circle of life kind of week for me personally, with all of the accompanying emotions. I managed to sneak away from the sawmill long enough to visit Sisa before her Pop's funeral. Guess who I ran into? Um hmm...my own parents :) We had a group hug and cried. As I exited the parlor, I passed by Pop's casket and stopped to salute a fallen soldier. Rest in peace and tell jokes like you never told before.

The last funeral I went to where there was a flag draped over the casket was George's way back in February. His death was sudden, totally unexpected and more than likely due to negligence. As a healthcare provider I am slow to place blame on the medical community, but this was a full blown case of a man lost in the system. A very young man with a lot of golf left to play. His widow Sue and I are good friends from inside of work and out and this has already been a tough holiday season for her and their family. We have faith, together, that closure is around the bend.

My friend the crackhead roaddog of I-40 told me the other day that he didn't "like" funerals. What I really think he was saying is that he's afraid of death, but I could be reading between the lines. My ex always did say I'd try to f***ing analyze people. He said it in such a way that it wasn't taken as a compliment to my analytical skills.

Cousin Deb's second grandchild was on the way this morning when she called me at work. This has been the year for procreation in this family, I'm just saying. We haven't seen a growth spurt like this in decades!

One.more.day at the sawmill. Just like the little engine who could.

^j^

in memory of pop

2008-12-12T16:36:00.005-06:00

Daughters - John Mayer

When Sisa and I were teenagers, we tended to run with the wild bunch, if you know what I mean. The longer the hair the better with lots of rock. I knew her older sister first but when their house burned and they moved into the Plaza hotel it was party time. She and I grew tired of the whole anti-establishment thing after a few years and set our sights on going to college. Her major was drama and mine was, of course, science. I remember the day well that she came to hug me goodbye on her way to Knoxville, our lives changing forever. I ended up back home and she took off out of Tennessee after awhile. Now she lives in Seattle with her husband and young daughter, teaching drama and theatre to college students.

Over the years she has made trips home, almost always calling me for a sit down at her family's kitchen table with her parents in attendance. Sometimes there was a brother or two around and we'd talk about stuff from back in the day. Pop and his brother were TV repairmen of the old school variety...a long lost blast from the past of the fifties and sixties when things were simpler but beginning to get complicated. Ms. Ruth worked right alongside them in the business all of those years.

After Sisa's daughter was born and got old enough, she and Pop visited on Skype and kept in touch. He started getting sick several years ago, and things came to a crisis point last month. The last ditch surgical effort to save his life kept him alive long enough to get some things done...goodbyes,mostly...and move on peacefully to his next life.

There are lessons that I've learned from this family that I will never forget as long as I live. Pop and Ms. Ruth are representatives of the good parts of my past and the continuity of family and friendship over a lifetime, and I treasure that.

To Sisa and the brood.....I love you with all of my heart.

Keep the faith ^j^

another close call

2008-12-11T21:51:00.002-06:00

*whew* We have a cut tree...and it's decorated. And it is beeyotiful. And there's two weeks left before Santa comes!

the grinch who (almost) stole christmas

2008-12-10T14:09:00.003-06:00

It's a tough call to name top grinch this year because I have so many personal favorites to nominate for this very special honor when times are as hard as they are in my little world. I do believe, though, that this year's grinch shall be the money grubbing bastards at DirecTV who robbed me blind with an unauthorized charge to my debit card. HOWEVER....a close second goes to my local bank for not reimbursing me for this nearly 500 dollar hit which they allowed to go through without a blink. I am beyond broke. And I am tired of fighting the system and losing. Don't you people know it's Jesus' birthday???

After attempting to fix (and failing miserably) my mother's printer this morning so that she can do her Christmas cards, I headed east on Hwy 104 to the place out in the boonies where they crack pecans and blow the dust off. NINETY SEVEN POUNDS is what those four bags weighed. No wonder I'm so sore!!! There is probably that amount again laying in their yard, which I will get to when the weather becomes a bit more picker friendly.

I think I've mentioned before about the old guy who comes out and piddles around under the trees picking up a sackful now and then. He was out like me this morning, scouring the ground following those high winds. He stopped by where I was working and asked "What do you do with those pecans?" "Crack 'em...eat 'em" was my reply. He then offered to give me the pile that was in the bottom of his bucket. My basket was almost full and I told him I didn't think it would hold them all. "You got no faith" was his reply. And he managed to fit them all in there with room to spare.

Yep, mister. I got a little faith, but I'm always praying for more.

^j^

all i want for christmas

2008-12-09T19:19:00.002-06:00

...is to have the tree up before New Year's Eve. Seriously, I am that far behind on gettin' the sugarplum dance going on around here. My poor babygirl came home with a two foot tall fake tree from the dollar store last night just to remind me that I've been way too busy stalking pecan trees and ignoring my duties as the creator of holiday cheer. "Two weeks!" she exclaimed. I want to see some damn lights shining in the darkness on my way home. You see, the problem is that ~~the maid is on vacation~~ we've been so busy that the house is a total wreck and we just can't stand to deck the halls over the dirt. We're funny like that, even though we sleep with dogs and cats.

The lack of a tree makes the absence of gifts much less bearable though I do have one with MY name on it waiting for a place to rest. All of that will come after this week's payday unless our respective employers decide to bailout before then. If they do? Hmm..Santa will surely do the switches and ashes thing to them, if there is a speck of justice in this universe.

Up at the sawmill, there's a fierce competition in the works between departments in the decorating and parade contests. Never fear, there will be pictures and our theme is top secret.

We've had a freakin' MONSOON around here last night and today with high winds and heavy rain. Needless to say, Mama and Daddy were up all night due to the excessive noise of those stubborn pecans giving up the ghost and smacking their tin roof like little bombs. Me? I slept like a baby with Faith and Sam. Soon as it dries out a bit, I'll be bending, stooping and scooping again. In between trips to the Dollar General, of course.

And lastly, to those of you who have it all under control with the fire burning warmly and all the trappings of the glorious holiday season in place I have just one thing to say.

Bah..humbug!

meeting grace

2008-12-07T19:41:00.002-06:00

Against all odds, I made to to Alli's bridal shower today. It's a long story about twists of fate and Murphy's law so I won't bore you with it. Her future mother, grandmother and aunt in-laws were all there. Her girlfriend Jill did the honor or writing stuff down for posterity. That girl's got her Daddy's eyes, no doubt.

Otherwise, it's the same old pecan season thing....bend, stoop and scoop. Daddy says that commercial pecan growers have these tractors and put a big old bag up around the tree and then shake the nuts down outta' those stubborn upper limbs. We ain't that high tech yet, but maybe someday when I'm too old to make the effort and Sugardaddy buys the hardware.

Tried to burn the asparagus bones yesterday but it was a bit windy and damp. Maybe I won't catch the pasture on fire this year, huh Deb? Johnboy had intended to go tree hunting in the woods today but got caught up in all of our drama. By the time we got done, it was dark. Maybe sometime later in the week.

I'm outta here. Ya'll keep the faith ^j^

i see dead people

2008-12-05T19:25:00.002-06:00

One morning this week as I was headed to the time clock, I scurried toward the elevator so as not to be late and get a demerit. As I rounded the corner the funeral home guys wheeled their velvet draped gurney out toward the hearse waiting at the east entrance on the ground floor over by the morgue. Unless they're unclaimed or there is suspicion of foul play, nobody chills very long at our place because their families are anxious to get them outta there to make arrangements. Many of them never saw it coming, or if they did there was some major denial going on with some of them and precious time was being wasted on hand wringing, treatment plans and projections of life span.

It reminded me of why I fell in love with the concept of end-of-life care improvement years ago. Each patient that we serve is at some turning point on the journey of life. They trust in us as healthcare providers to help them through the scary times and do the right thing for them and their families. Unfortunately, healthcare today is all about making money for stockholders. I have a serious problem with that way of doing business when it comes to the dignity of human life as a commodity.

One of my favorite books on the subject was written by Dr.Ira Byock about his experiences as a physician caring for his terminally ill father. He later began a project in the small rural city of Missoula, Montana to study how everyday people deal with the rituals that accompany death and dying and the social dynamics of families and communities in response to that death, aside from reading obituaries in the newspaper and showing up respectfully at the viewing.

Life is a circle, you know? I've stuck a lot of big fat pregnant women in labor with needles and watched their babies wiggle in their little bonnets and gloves in their respective nursery cribs while I drew blood from their heels. Babygirl was one of them. So were Sara, Jane Carolyn and countless other kids of friends and friends of friends' kids. Sometimes they have to bring them back in for a bilirubin check, all dressed up for their first outing in the infant carrier. Usually there's a nervous granny hovering close by causing mucho anxiety but lots of support for the new mom. Sometimes there's no moral support whatsoever and that's just plain sad in anybody's book.

I have a weekend off and Lord knows I need the sleep. Us old pecan pickers don't do well without some catch-up-with-the-dogs-under-the-blankets time. I'm just sayin...it's how I keep the faith.
^j^

Dust In The Wind - Kansas

ho made

2008-12-03T19:31:00.003-06:00

There is a certain artistic license that flows easily when a girl is dead ass broke during the Christmas season. Forget the Wii and the diamonds...just shop Avon and get creative to show the ones you love that you cherish them as much as that baby in the manger. That's what it's all about, right? Well, it used to be, and still could be. While I certainly hate to see corporate America taking a nosedive into the shitpile but it sort of makes me grateful that I never bought into all of it. Good morning America...it's wakeup time. What a cool holiday gift.

cookin' with gas

2008-12-01T17:56:00.002-06:00

Monday is about the only day that I'm allowed to make noise due to Babygirl's sleeping schedule so I've been doing kitchen duty this evening. Tomorrow afternoon is our office Christmas party. As we all have known for a few years and the experts confirmed for us just today, we are in a recession so we have decided to forego the luxury of a bought honeyglazed ham this year. Instead, one is baking in my oven as.I.type for 1/3 of the purchase price of one of those fancy schmancy ones. Well, I guess you have to tack on the cost of my propane. I'm also in charge of wine, though I can't imagine why anyone would put a beer kinda' gal on that. White zin all around, I say. It goes well with my world famous spinach dish.

Just talked with Yaya and she is headed to the Christmas parade with grandson Huck in tow. I remember the last time I ~~was forced into that deal~~ attended it as one of the high points of Babygirl's life, right along with the last obligatory trip to the county fair and trick-or-treating. Sometimes, moms just want to have fun or take nap instead of showing up at the appointed hour to pick up ~~a child~~ a pack of kids from an oh so important social function.

We were treated to snow showers today in the 'burg and I had forgotten how pretty it can be when the temp is just right so as not to make it a driving hazard. Sorry, no pics. It was what we optimists call serendipity.

^j^

why is lily so annoyed??

2008-11-30T15:35:00.003-06:00

Hmm. Well it could be because I've been so busy pickin' up pecans and chopping down the asparagus that I haven't been at the computer where she climbs from my lap up onto my left shoulder, her favorite perch. Sorry girl. I'll try to do better as soon as I get the Christmas decorations down from the attic. Really.

Yesterday was asparagus chopping day which is not a small chore for a fatass middle aged gal with a hand held tool. I got her done though, and the yellowed ferns lie in a big pile waiting for dry weather so I can burn that nitrogen back into the soil. The bed has already been treated to a liberal dose of potash. Then, come March....VOILA! As you can see from the picture, my bed is located next to a fence and in the summer multiflora roses, honeysuckle and poke take over the fence side. My goal is to get that cleaned out early in the spring where it won't come back to bite me in November next year. Let's just say my hands and arms look like I was in a catfight and lost miserably. The weather forecast is calling for snow this evening. Bring it on I say.

Anybody got any leftover turkey? I'll trade you some pecans for it! Happy Cyber Monday eve to you and yours.

^j^

lost in space as a goose

2008-11-29T19:45:00.003-06:00

Okay then. Today is my friend and Yaya's boyfriend Doug's 60th birthday and she cooked up a surprise party for him. The plan was for all of us to show up at the Harris house way out in ~~bumfuck~~ the Lenox hills around 5:30 which is pitch black at this time of year. I headed out, confident that I knew which road it was on so how hard could it be to find a number? I overestimated my directionally challenged self by a longshot. After two phone calls from the center of Lenox ( which consists of the Baptist church ) to another friend to get help and 45 minutes of driving the dark backroads and dodging gullies I gave it up and headed for home. Maybe Santa will bring me a GPS so I can get where I'm trying to go *sigh* Sometimes I think old Poops needs a keeper. I even put on makeup and everything! Happy birthday Douglas. Only 52 more days until Dubya's last day :)

Holiday lights are already twinkling all over the 'burg so I'm behind, as usual. Procrastination, thy name is Janie. I tend to do things when the spirit moves rather than by the calendar. Besides, when you put up a live tree you have to wait until a bit closer to Christmas so you don't burn the old house down, chimney and all.

A visit from an old friend has inspired me to work on my organizational skills so that I can find stuff when I need it, which is no small task around here. Dude even hooked me up with a redneck dryer handle to replace the broken off plastic one. Low maintenance? You bet your sweet ass.

dysorganiztion

2008-11-28T21:18:00.002-06:00

It's never been my strong suit, putting things in boxes and files and generating reports. Lord knows I try to be prepared but when push comes to shove, I can't find whatever it was that I bought at the dollar store to make things work around here. It's too much house for one smartass woman, even if she is determined to stay close to home.

Truth be told? My reasons for being here on the hill to this day live about a mile down the road at the old homeplace. They are aging quickly and need attention of the poops and bubba variety on a regular basis. We are partners of sorts, in this virtual hospice experience. It's what kids do when they've been raised up right.

Today's Grace

1. Not one inkling of regret for not lining up at the supermegastore this morning to buy ~~cheap~~ Chinese made goods. Buy American, by gawd.

2. JRD

3. Eva Cassidy

4. Steady pace at the sawmill but nothing we couldn't manage to handle even on a short staffed day.

5. The Butterbean Grin :)

Goodnight my friends ^j^

the virtue of consistency

2008-11-27T19:27:00.002-06:00

Being the faithful one that I am, I've never much thought about that particular character trait as something that others are attracted to but it seems to be so with my friends and loved ones. Good old reliable Poopie, bless her heart. Surely there will be mucho manna in heaven.

Occasionally the traveler gets weary and just wants to have the manna right damn now served up as a special treat just because. Sort of a good samaritan story with a personal twist. I've had plenty of these, and so have you if you stop to think about it. Trouble is, we're just too busy being fabulous to remember. Today has been that kind of day for me. Thanksgiving is a celebration of friends and family that lends itself to reflection about all things good, even when all things evil rage around us.

The last pecan season that my youngest brother was here, he climbed up into my favorite tree and shook the branches like a kid so that the nuts would rain down around me before it got terribly cold. My dumbass tried that today but I couldn't climb high enough to do much good. I'd hate to have to call 911 from the ditch to come haul me out. I was scared of falling, to be honest. I think I'll just let nature take its' course.

There's a metaphor there with me and love. I tried to explain this to a buddy today over the phone but I don't think he got it. Men are funny like that in their simplicity. No big thing, right? Girls are complicated sometimes so just deal with it. The good ones are worth the effort.

Grace, day 3

1. A purring content cat on my lap.

2. Turkey sandwich on wheat with mayo.

3. The redneck comedy tour, most especially Larry the Cable Guy.

4. Advent wreath.

5. Trapp's Sexy Cinnamon...YUM.

just another day in paradise

2008-11-26T20:23:00.005-06:00

Thanks Big Ernie. Love ya...mean it ^j^

giving thanks

2008-11-25T19:14:00.004-06:00

It's my turn to be off work on Thanksgiving, a tradeoff for working Christmas and New Year's Day. I've worked there for 31.5 years so I figure I've showed up at the sawmill on roughly 50% of holidays during my tenure, though thankfully always on a rotation. When I was younger, it mattered a lot. Now? Not so much. It's just a day on the calendar and seasons lend themselves to being celebrated at will for those with the spirit to do so.

GRACE, DAY 2

Sore muscles from the manual labor required for a good pecan harvest.

Quality time at the antique kitchen table with Babygirl.

House.

Reasonable gas prices.

Dollar store hair color and an appointment with Miss Rhonda.

^j^

days of grace

2008-11-23T17:57:00.003-06:00

I had never met Schmutzie before yesterday but I like her style already. While visiting my fairy blogmother I read of Schmutzie's project which Jennifer is also going to do. The whole idea is to slow down enough to center yourself on the blessings in life and count them daily for a year. A gratitude journal, if you will. Of course this isn't a new concept, but it's one that I've never fully embraced without getting sidetracked by the fast pace of being all that is Poopie. This time I'll give it my best effort. The magic number is five, and some days it can be pretty hard to come up with just ONE thing to be grateful for. But you know what? I'm sure going to give it my best shot. Because, you know. It's almost Thanksgiving.

1. Looking forward to some quality time with my adopted daughter Heather this week.

2. Also anticipating ( but by no means counting on ) a visit with a loud mouth guy I haven't seen in way too long.

3. Being knocked in the soft dirt by three loving dogs who fight over which will have the pleasure of greeting me first.

4. Seeing the bullheaded wife of my daily-stop family owned grocery store owner and sharing pecans with her straight from the bags in my back seat to her plastic sack.

5. Scoring leftover biscuits from Mom for the dressing and a ten foot piece of PVP pipe from Daddy to whack those stubborn pecan limbs.

I won't be posting these things necessarily HERE every day, but they will be recorded. When I figure out how to share, I'll let you know.

long time no rant

2008-11-22T19:09:00.002-06:00

Like many of you fellow Americans, I'm watching to see what Congress does with this whole bailout deal concerning the big three American automakers. My inner conspiracy theorist can't help but think that the plummet in gas prices is just a big tease to get us to buy into their ploy to keep on keepin' on with the status quo. Sorry dudes...I won't ever forget the time when my Babygirl was working the graveyard shift to buy gas for a sub-sub compact vehicle just to commute to school an hour away. Which was precisely when I was dividing the gas in the can between the mower and the Toyota. Some things you just don't get past us without harboring a tad of bitterness toward ginormous corporations, et al. What kind of idiot has the gonads to fly on a private jet to Washington asking for free money from us taxpayers? Don't EVEN get me started, or we'll have another Boston Tea Party.

The Dubya administration will most likely show up in the history books a few years from now as the black hole that almost devoured our country, one Republican asshat at a time. The high points? Bill Frist and Terri Schiavo. Junior and his entourage driving smooth past Cindy Sheehan and friends refusing to discuss her grief. Katrina and her aftermath. All of these were knee jerk reactions that insulted the intelligence of the American people by daring to claim that we either didn't know better or couldn't do better for citizens of our nation.

I have a confession to make, and it ain't pretty but it's pure Poops. In the days following the WTC bombing on 9/11 a little piece of me understood the anger toward western ways. I was shocked beyond belief, but I could see the logic of those who can't begin to know what we're about beyond Wall Street and Britney Spears. Generations of folks over there have been inbred with hate for our self indulgence and we bought into it like good little consumers with easy credit at our fingertips. I lived it and survived. So will the big 3.

The way I look at it is this. When life gives you leftovers, make soup. There's a pot on my stove right now begging to be shared with the world. All you need is some cornbread or crackers ^j^

going nuts

2008-11-21T14:28:00.003-06:00

I lost my keys earlier in the week, which is not at all an unusal thing for me to do. However, I always find them and this time I haven't. The way I figure it, one of two things happened. Lily the cat loves to push things off of tables just to watch them drop and then she jumps down and plays with whatever it is until she pushes it up under the furniture. I've looked under every stick of furniture in this house and under every cushion. Nada. The most likely explanation is that they fell out of my pocket when I was down on my hands and knees picking up pecans. I'll probably find 'em when I mow the yard next spring. Nice little hardware store guy hooked me up with some new ones for four bucks.

Went up to the kudzu yesterday evening to visit with Yaya and hear the house band. These folks can rock...I'm just saying. Of course Beverly could make anything sound good with that killer voice of hers.

I'll be at the sawmill this weekend so ya'll don't party too hard without me. Things look pretty busy from here to next year, as they always do around the holidays. I'm in charge of dressing, asparagus and deviled eggs for Thanksgiving dinner at Mom's house. I'm not near as organized as my friend Kay who ALWAYS has her dishes in the freezer by halloween, but I do have the cornbread made. The menu for Mom's birthday luncheon included quiche lorraine, baked pineapple, asparagus rollups and baby carrots. A good time was had by all four of us and we are still stuffed today.

The woods close to the main road look like a tornado has ripped through them but my brother explains that it is the "green" way to cut timber taking out only the tops of selected trees allowing for re-growth. Imagine that. What a helluva conservationist!

I will leave you with this touching holiday greeting that was sent to me by my good friend Chucky. " If the Natives had given the Pilgrim Fathers a donkey instead of a turkey we would all be having a piece of ass for Thanksgiving."

Over and out from Pecan Lane. Keep the faith ^j^

girl power

2008-11-20T21:23:00.002-06:00

Happy Birthday Mom. Love ya...mean it ^j^

pass the straterra

2008-11-18T19:04:00.003-06:00

I swear ya'll. If I didn't know better, I'd swear I'm suffering from ADHD, middle adult onset, of course. It sorta' goes like this. There is a day job for which I was trained many MANY years ago when I was a much younger woman. It (almost) pays the bills for me and the babygirl to live here on Pecan Lane close to the grands. Sometimes the job provides an opportunity to bond with those who light up when they see my face. I love it when that happens.

Lately, though, I find myself wondering about all the things that I want to do and can't seem to find time for because I've been too busy going in a thousand different directions chasing my tail trying to solve the most current fiscal household problem. You see, I've always had this vision and a passion for life that just won't quit. There was a time or two that I damn near lost them, but somehow faith always brings 'em both back around to keep me going in the right direction, toward the light.

Tomorrow's forecast is windy. I can imagine those pecans dropping already. Oh, and guess who made an A on her Capstone paper? I'll give you a hint. It wasn't me.

^j^

third time's charm

2008-11-17T18:47:00.002-06:00

It seems that Faith doesn't like smelling good because she just got her third bath in three days to wash off the stinky smell that she insists on rolling all over. Poor thing tried to crawl up in the cabinet under the bathroom sink to get away from me but it didn't work. I'm bigger than her. And a whole bunch more ornery.

The daily ritual now includes bending and stooping to pick up pecans and sort 'em by size into the buckets riding the back seat of the trusty old Camry with three hubcaps, one tail light and three door handles. She's never very clean anyway, but this time of year there's leaves and dirt all over the interior to accentuate the various and sundry stains and bits of trash. As a bonus, it turns out that bending my fat ass over and bringing it back upright doing legsquats is good exercise. Let's just say that I'm feeling the burn.

My beloved and funny as hell mother turns 75 on Thursday and I've been wracking my brain trying to come up with something special that doesn't cost a lot. So I said to myself "Self...she would love your company." I'm off that day so I plan to cook a few things out of her world famous cookbook and surprise her with a luncheon that includes her younger sister. Maybe we can pass the time and catch up on some happenings from the past and present. We've had two new grandbabies hatched already this year with another one in the oven due around Christmas. Yeah...seems like the family is expanding somewhat. I hope they don't all expect a present because I'm broke, thanks to DirecTV ahd Dubya.

Things were hopping at the sawmill today because "you know who" was seeing patients in the ER and ordering everything he was big enough to. That's a story for another day, and one that repeats itself all over the country when docs try to cover their butts instead of using the old thinking cap and doing a differential diagnosis. This ain't my first rodeo...or even my tenth. Wonder of wonders! Sisa's pop survived the surgery, got off of the vent and was sittin' up in his bed reading the paper today. There ain't much in that rag of interest, but he's been in the ozone for a few days so it was all news to him, bless his heart. By the way...Obama is still president-elect, Pop.

Hmmm...what else? Maybe more.

Later ^j^

who let the dogs out

2008-11-16T18:39:00.004-06:00

This is the view from my kitchen window. The colors and shadows change according to the season, but it's been pretty much mine for twenty odd years. I say a great big thank you to Big Ernie everytime I step up to that porcelain sink to wash dishes and enjoy such a view.

All three dawgs got a bath last night. Faith promptly went out and rolled in shit today, because that's what happy country dogs do. Poor thing just wants to go duck huntin' but nobody will teach her how to swim and fetch. What a shame.

I went by the feed store yesterday and got some mesh bags for the pecan crop and a bag of fertilizer for the asparagus bed. Oh, yeah. And a big sack of black oil sunflower seed for the birdies to eat this winter. It was a bit warmer today so I ventured out on bended knee to steal some pecans from the squirrels. There's about ten different sizes out there but the best ones are at the bottom of the lane...Stuarts. We're expecting a freeze this week so that ought to snap 'em right out of the hull.

Here's a recipe ya'll might enjoy if you happen to come across some spare pecans.

ROASTED PECANS

4 cups pecans
2T Country Bob's sauce
2T A1 sauce
1 stick butter

Melt all except pecans in microwave. Stir in pecans to coat. Spread on baking sheet and salt. Bake in 325 degree oven for 30 minutes, stirring and salting at ten minute intervals. Drain on paper towels and store in airtight container.

2008-11-14T17:38:00.003-06:00

Okay, then. The weekend is finally here and that sucker is MINE. I'm kickin' it off with music, beer and cleaning up the ~~hogpen~~ crib. Rain is at the back door. Dogs are on the couch. All is well in my little world and I am free to reflect on the capricious nature of the past two weeks of life. All I can say is thank you to Big Ernie for faith that kicks in at just the right moment.

The great DirecTV robbery remains under investigation with no resolution thus far. Doesn't look much like anybody will get a diamond ring or new car for Christmas, if you know what I mean. However, there are pecans aplenty to be picked up, cracked, cleaned and roasted. Iron skillet #2 of cornbread is in the oven in preparation for our upcoming Thanksgiving feast, Stafford style.

This has been an interesting week at the sawmill for me, personally, as I have had a vested interested in two particular patients outside of the usual realm of quality patient care. Both of them are tough old birds with a fierce will to live. Ms. Betty had a very serious operation last week but did well and hopefully went home today. Her oldest son is an old high school friend with whom I chat occasionally when he's in the mood to share, which ain't often. Usually he's wired like a NASCAR driver on crack.

The prognosis looked quite grim for my best friend Sisa's pop as he headed into surgery to stop the bleeding from a big fat honking bladder tumor. A COPD patient, he couldn't be put to sleep so the plan was to get up in there under epidural and see what could be done. Plan A didn't work and they had to knock him out and entubate. Wonder of wonders, the tube came out yesterday and he's doing fine. Tell me Big Ernie ain't good ya'll. There is a plan and all we have to do is show up. Really.

We almost had two new critters this week but it wasn't meant to be. Bubba called the other day asking if I had the time to bottle feed a calf if he made it through the night. My first thought was WTF but the idea grew on me and Babygirl was excited at the prospect too. Poor thing didn't live so I imagine he's down in the cattle graveyard. Mama cow will be burger come spring because there was no milk. Such is life on the farm.

Cousins Debbie and Ronnie (aka sexy) live in Kentucky and love animals about like we do. They had this young beagle named Barney that needed a place romp and play so they were going to pass him on to me because I have a weakness for that breed, so to speak. Goes back to my childhood trauma of seeing my favorite pet Nosey get run over while I was playing in the ditch in front of the house. Anyways, Barney didn't make it either. Dude dug out of his pen and ran right smack out in front of a truck on Highway 95. *sigh* He's up there in doggie heaven with Nosey I reckon.

More later from Pecan Lane. Keep the faith ^j^

every picture tells a story

2008-11-12T18:18:00.001-06:00

day of honor

2008-11-11T17:14:00.004-06:00

I don't have a clue who this guy is. Up at the kudzu last month, Bev asked me to to snap his pic, fresh back from a tour in Iraq. Though I have ranted and raved and expressed much opinion against this war, I do appreciate those who have served our country like the ones before them. This one's for you, dude.

^j^

it's good to be queen

2008-11-10T19:01:00.002-06:00

Happy 25th birthday Anna!

pecan eatin' dogs and twin calves

2008-11-09T16:17:00.004-06:00

Oh my...what an eventful weekend it has been on the farm. It is calving season and Bubba comes out a couple of times a day to check the herd and see who has given birth so he can tag 'em and match up baby with Mama. Yesterday I did a ridealong with him in the old blue Chevy truck. We meandered through pastures and gaps and found one calf who had just been born! Mama hadn't even cleaned up the mess yet, so we kept our distance after he got it tagged. The twins were born earlier in the week....a rarity that I suppose you could call bonus meat. One of them is feeding with the mother and the other has been adopted by another cow. It's funny how nature works like that.

Pecans are starting to fall on a regular basis when the wind and rain blow through to nudge them out of the hull. Looks like a good year, which is a fortunate thing since all three dogs like to eat 'em shell and all. I've got a couple of those picker-upper thingies but do my best work down on my hands and knees once the leaves are raked away. Five gallon buckets will ride in the back seat of the trusty old Camry from now through December to collect the manna on trips back and forth to town. It's cold work but something I can't bear to pass up. When Big Ernie sees fit to drop you a gift, you pick it up.

I'm going to consult an attorney about the great DirecTV robbery and see if I have a prayer in my complaint against the thievin' bastards. I sincerely hope that their CEO chokes on my hard earned five hundred bucks while he's out with a call girl on a tropical island. No..wait. I hope he gets an STD! Something really nasty like herpes would be fitting.

I've often wondered why in the name of all that is holy that ANYBODY would want to be president. Most of 'em are millionaires before they ever get there so it's not about the money. In the case of Obama, he and Biden have inherited a huge clusterfuck of a mess in this country with economic woes out the wazoo and consumer confidence at an all time low. Yes we can? I certainly hope so.

Over and out. Ya'll have a good week. If you're really good Santa might bring you some pecans from the lane.

^j^

mayday

2008-11-07T17:27:00.002-06:00

As shitty weeks go, I'd probably have to put this one up there in the playoffs, complete with brackets. Faithful old Poops has taken a couple of hits that threaten to ~~kill~~ injure the spirit that is pure optimist on most days. It all started with the great DirecTV robbery of my checking account.

I've been a long time customer of said company without a contract. I noticed that there were some overcharges on the bill for some length of time and when I called to get some resolution earlier this year their telephone answerer couldn't really give me my money back but offered a ten dollar a month credit on my bill for a year and a free! upgrade! to a DVR receiver. Okay...so we weren't even, but I took it. Last month I decided to take advantage of a bundling deal with my telephone provider so I called DTV to terminate service and settle up. Much to my surprise that day's telephone answerer told me that I was in an 18 month contract with their company and I would be charged an early termination fee. Hmmm...phone answerer #1 failed to mention that little detail. Anyway, long story short. I know ya'll are ready to go out and party like a rock star.

I look at my checking account online daily. When I logged in Monday I saw a big fat honkin' charge from DirecTV of almost 500 bucks, charged to my debit card without my authorization. I pay by the month when the money is there, and I do it with a debit card which they had on file. Anybody who has spent any time around Casa Poops knows for damn sure there ain't 500 extra bucks laying around in there collecting interest. Fortunately it was soon after payday so I had time to run to the credit union and borrow FIVE HUNDRED FREAKIN' DOLLARS to cover this unauthorized debit. It is in dispute with both ~~huge corporate rapist~~ company and bank. We shall see if Big Ernie thinks I've paid enough dues as a hard-working-single-mother-of-a-college-student. Let us pray and be specific.

My friend Elizabeth works at the sawmill too and we have been through piles and piles of shit there during the multiple sales of said facility. We were the clinical backbone of the IS conversion in conjunction with our most recent sale. She earned a well deserved Employee of the Year status the next go around. She had a stroke this week, most likely stress induced from crunching numbers the hard way for a giant corporation. Making do with less while producing more. She is expected to recover fully, but the whole deal just put another nail in the coffin that holds my belief in any sort of goodness associated with big business.

The one bright spot was Tuesday morning, waking up to the news that at least America didn't elect McCain and Palin. Somebody has been watching Comedy Central, I suspect. Or maybe they're just tired of lies and war. Who the hell knows at this point. Following months of bitter back biting over coffee pots and keyboards everywhere, it is a done deal. How about we just take what we've got and grow that peace and love idea, huh?

Then of course, there's the man in the cave thing. I have always been one to listen to guys like a therapist or something instead of making them earn my attention and affection. I don't try too hard, but I'm a good friend and listener and meet people where they are, even the ones with baggage. I thought I had honed my instincts during six years of single life to the point that I could see a direct hit coming. My bad. That's "Sister Elizabeth Jane of the Diocese of Pecan Lane" to ya'll from now on.

^j^

2008-11-05T20:24:00.005-06:00

I'm just saying..the colors are awesome.

2008-11-03T18:19:00.001-06:00

I'll be over here this month.

bless our hearts

2008-11-02T16:52:00.003-06:00

This election is historic in many ways, one of which is that it happens to be the one during which I finally took off the rose colored glasses and grew up. I understand very clearly now that it doesn't matter much who's the CEO and vice CEO of the country because it's ~~corporate~~ Congress that makes the decisions which affect our daily lives and they just let the Prez show up for the roll-out. Most have perks that none of us could dare imagine, and while they run the show we the people have to take our places on the stage and act the part. We should pay closer attention to what they're doing and call 'em on things that need to be changed. That's just my humble opinion. Oh, and term limits :) Don't get the Mambo King started on THAT one!

Cousin Deb just called from KY and we discussed the joys of fall and winter gardening. Helps to get past the depression of dark at 4:30 for a few months. This is when the bed and the dogs start looking mighty good around 8:30. That's one of the nicer things about aging...that it doesn't seem like a waste at all to give it up and rest. It's a necessity. I talked to an school old friend out in Seattle yesterday who has a freakin' seven year old and wouldn't trade one minute of it BUT....she's even more weary than me.

Oh, and just to let you know that this old girl still has the right stuff? I got blood from the arm of a 5 day old today after four other people tried. Yeah...they're gonna miss me when I'm gone.

^j^

"The sad truth is that most evil is done by people who never make up their minds to be either good or evil."--Hannah Arendt

2008-10-31T16:42:00.004-05:00

I left the sawmill this afternoon and called Mama to see if she needed a ride home from ICU duty. She was bored to tears, and took me up on the offer. We swung by and picked up the Babygirl's check and headed toward the hood. An old and dear friend of hers died a couple of days ago and we were talking about the funeral arrangements. That's when she started talking about her own wishes and advising me about the family dynamics that will surely be a part of said event.

We chatted about the china that was sold the the set to be passed on, if and when the BG decides to set up a homeplace somewhere. It was an easy casual conversation about last wishes and honor. It wasn't until I dropped her off at the log cabin that it dawned on me exactly what had been shared and what kind of weight that it carried. About the time I hit Pecan Lane, the tears started flowing. Didn't take long to build up to a full fledged "ugly cry" and all the snot that gets slung along with it. When I saw LP, she immediately gave me a hug and then listened like a true amigo and daughter. "We're in this together, Mom." And she meant it. Faith in action? You bet your ass.

^j^

boo!

2008-10-30T21:53:00.000-05:00

I don't know about ya'll, but this scares the poop out me!

tis the season

2008-10-29T14:35:00.002-05:00

Today was a day away from the sawmill but I ended up cruising by there anyway to get a flu shot. In my business, it's as routine as turning the clock back in the fall. Early voting action was brisk when I stopped by there to cast my ballot. We've had our first frost but it wasn't a killer and the afternoons warm up very nicely. My propane tank appreciates that.

Me and Yaya and the Redneck Friend were all together at the kudzu yesterday for the first time in ages. Each of us has our own lives going ninety mph but we do so love gettin' together to trade trash now and then. Hey...it's what friends do.

Reunion '08 is another memory except for the pictures and the bills. Note to committee for future reference: Do NOT schedule a reunion on the 4th Saturday in October ever again. It is a sacred day for UT fans even when they're losing.

In other news, the Mambo King is flying high at the prospect of going to St. Thomas next summer to be a beach bum. Who is he, you might ask? I'll tell ya later. I visited my Mom and Dad today and found them double teaming in the kitchen putting together a frozen salad. She was on the mixer and he was chopping bananas. Organized chaos, and I love every minute of it.

Ya'll watch out for flying brooms and goblins. And keep the faith. ^j^

the pecan man

2008-10-27T18:21:00.003-05:00

I don't have a freakin' clue who this guy is, but every year around this time he turns up on his hands and knees under the wild pecan trees seeking his fortune. Many of the trees that line our lane are a hundred years old or more. They overlap up top in such a way that you might think you were in the southern part of France or deep in the bayou. It's a helluva pretty sight to come home to every day.

I promised way back in July not to bitch about the cold when it got here and I won't because I can finally breathe normally again. I don't know what the hell it is around here that chokes me up in October but I'm glad it's almost gone. Probably ragweed and kudzu. Wonder if they have allergy shots for kudzu? The basil and oregano are snug in the kitchen, waiting to be flung on top of my latest culinary experiment.

Still mulling over the Halloween costume. I saw a couple the other night dressed as McCain and Palin and they were dead on. About the only part I've ever played with any sort of conviction was Janis Joplin when I was in high school, complete with velvet dress, granny glasses and a rousing rendition of Mercedes Benz.

"Oh Lord, won't you buy me ~~a Mercedes Benz~~ a week on the beach...I'm counting on you Lord....please don't let me down."

^j^

dancing with the stars

2008-10-26T15:46:00.003-05:00

What has twenty legs and can manage a seventeen minute booty shake to Motown? Why, the DHS Class of '73 dancers, of course! We are mighty, hear us pant :) My 35th class reunion was a barrel of fun and then some. Wish ya'll could have been there.

I've somehow managed to forget that I even HAVE a day job, much less think about it during my time off. I'd call that a successful vacation. Rested? Not a bit. But inspired to keep on trudging through the poop with a little help from my friends.

I've been a non-participant in NaNoWriMo for the past couple of years, but this time the spirit has moved me to ante up. You can read what you like of it at that other place where I write stories, the one that's not in the kudzu.

The weather is gorgeous and waiting to be enjoyed. See ya'll later.

^j^

they can kill you

2008-10-24T13:58:00.002-05:00

.....but they can't eat you." That's what this nice bank lady said one time when I was having a nuclear meltdown over how I would ever manage to pay back the money that I borrowed from 'em. At that time, they were only one of about ten creditors who were circling like wolves in a sheep field to get their piece of the recently divorced Poops. It's been kind of a blur, but most of them are paid back, even if a little late. Except for the one credit card that took me to court over 1500 bucks. And added legal fees. I won't say who the issuer is but it starts with Capitol and ends with One. Nice job boys. Just couldn't wait your turn, huh?

Now my ex-satellite provider wants to charge me for 17 months of a contract I didn't even know I was in. Never mind that the whole reason I left them is because of their shady billing practices. Starts with a D and ends with a V. I'll pay you for the previous month and that's it. It's always something around here, ya know?

In brighter news, I'm on vacation and the weather is absolutely fantastically gorgeous. I get to see a bunch of old people like myself this weekend that I haven't seen in years and some that I see all the time. Doesn't get much better than that. Note to self: Call Charlie Sheen's buddy sometime tonight. BG is interviewing today for her internship. You go girl.

My friend "2 dogs" turned 39 on Wednesday and she celebrated for two days. Last night we all met at the kudzu and ~~wished her well~~ danced our butts off on the stage. It's a girlfriend/birthday thang ya'll. A couple of other dear friends have whispered that they'll be gettin' hitched pretty soon and there WILL be a big party. I reckon, redneck. Never thought I'd see the day :)

Over and out from scenic downtown Pecan Lane.

Keep the faith ^j^

happy reunion ^j^

2008-10-22T19:37:00.002-05:00

Dedicated to the DHS Class of '73.

vacation state of mind

2008-10-21T16:42:00.002-05:00

I just talked to Yaya and Huck down there on the beach and they're having a great time so far. I'm off for a few days so I'm trying to do that transitional thing from totally wired and stressed to going with the flow. One or two more and I'll be there just in time for flannel and TV with the dogs. Did I ever mention how extremely low maintenance I can be? It's a perk of bein' an older woman.

The billing system around Poops Inc. is way too complicated so I've bundled some stuff just to simply. One bill for four services..can't beat that with a stick. That will knock three lines off the budget to make room for the propane guy ~~this winter~~ very soon. Buy local, I say. This dude drives 20 miles to deliver gas to us and has done it in the dead of winter with me whimpering that I'm flat out. Gotta love that type of service.

Allergies have been horrendous around here this year. Even people who have never been bothered have been wailing about the misery of weeping eyes and snot filled sinuses. I figure it has something to do with all that toxic election rhetoric floatin' around our atmosphere. Thank Big E that'll soon be over. If I hear the word "maverick" one more time, I swear I'm gonna choke Joe the Plumber and kick somebody's ass.

Over and out kids. See you on the flip side of vacation '08.

^j^

the progressive reunion

2008-10-20T17:40:00.002-05:00

One of the cool things about planning a class reunion is that you get a chance to see people when they're around even if they don't make it for the official event. To be such an old gal, I sure am really blessed to have as many friends as I do strung out all over the country. I just had a beer on the porch with one from Arizona :) I've talked with another one almost every day for the past two weeks while he was burning up the highways of Tennessee. He, by the way, did NOT stop by for a porch visit. Your bad, dude.

The pap smear was N.O.R.M.A.L this time, praise be to Big Ernie. If I can manage one more in three months I'm off the hook for awhile with the gyno-lovefest. Sheesh, man. Never again will I complain about that little once a year inconvenience.

As far as I know, BG got the big fat document delivered on time today. Her internship with a social work/mental health team at a school begins in January. Yay BG. You are one stick with it kind of gal.

One more day and I'm on vacation.

Do I hear a WooHoo?

learning the light

2008-10-17T17:16:00.003-05:00

When you're a camera fiend like me, it behooves oneself to become familiar with what the light can do in your immediate surroundings to improve the scene. My favorite time is sunset, so many of mine are made within an hour or two of that event. I can tell you just about what time the sun over Pecan Lane will set in any given month of the year because it's been my life for 20 years. Blessed? You bet your ass I am.

The computer has been tied up for three days now with BG working on her final big ginormous paper for school. Capstone, it's called. She's managed to line up two offers for internship so it's all good. Pretty soon the sleepless nights and hard work will all be a memory for awhile. Time to take it on the road.

My high school class is having a reunion this coming weekend...our 35th. A lot of people look at 'em as the next best thing to having a root canal, but I love it. In the past we've done it up all formal and stuff but this time it's about as laid back as you can get and still call it a party. I've been stalking some class members tryng to convince them to show up. Yeah, it's my evil twin that gets out on occasion. I have no doubt it will be one for the history books.

Ya'll know that Trapper died and got ~~dragged off with a tractor~~ put to rest a few weeks ago. It seems that Pride has recovered from his grief and started playing the "lets get out and watch the people chase me" game. Not that it's a hard thing to do, mind you. The ancient barbed wire and weathered fenceposts don't offer much resistance. We've run him back into the lot no less than 5 times this weekend and he's currently grazing on corn stalks. Wander on, dude. Don't get hit by a golf cart :)

There's this little side porch on my house which I figure was where the lady of the house stepped out years ago to tell the farm hands that supper was ready. It has turned into my favorite spot lately, to sit and gaze at things when the weather is nice like it is today. Doors and windows flung open, I feel like a kid again ready to romp in leaves and dress up all scary like. If I come up with a costume, I'll send ya'll a pic.

Peace and love. Rock and roll. Keep the faith ^j^

pecan lane

2008-10-16T15:58:00.000-05:00

i want to be the baby

2008-10-15T16:03:00.002-05:00

I've always thought it's a shame that childhood is so short, and we don't remember a whole lot of it anyway, and that adulthood is so dang long. As the years pass and my kids begin to have their own, I see how quickly it goes from carefree play to down and dirty drama. When we're little there are family members to cushion the blow of life's tragedies until we hit that magic age when...hmmm. Gotta deal with this.

When BG was little and wanted to cuddle up and "be the baby" I'd tease her by saying that's what I wanted! I was kidding, of course, but there are still times that I get that feeling and one of them is now. There's not any one particular thing that's got me wore out...just one of those days.

Peace out ya'll. Don't forget to watch the debate.

^j^

chicken rotel and term limits

2008-10-14T21:02:00.002-05:00

My brother plays poker with a bunch of guys who celebrate Wild!Meat!Monday! by grubbing out and dealing the cards. For Christmas last year, I gave him a gift certificate for Poopie made dinner for the gathering, at his choice of time and menu. He was thoughtful enough to wait until I had a day off in October to cash in his chips and give me the menu. Chicken Rotel and green beans. Cooked the real way for ten hungry folks. I noticed that it had been kinda warm in the house over the weekend, but then...I wasn't here much and I've got a box fan pointed directly at my fat ass when I'm sleepin'. Old habits die hard, ya know? Long story short, it's still hot here and I cooked all day. Corey showed up today to shoot some freon in there. Poops will sleep cool tonight.

Today was pap smear day in my 'hood so I gave myself a spit bath and reported for duty. A little perk of the job is that I have someone willing to take a serious look at the slide and be objective because he cares about me as a co-worker and friend. The lassez faire leadership style doesn't work for this old gal anymore. I've had a few procedures up in there to try to fix things but it still isn't normal which can be sort of worrisome at times. Might be time to move on up the steps toward cancer prevention. That's what just KILLS my smartass about healthcare insurance. They'll pay for expensive drugs to keep you alive way longer than Big Ernie intended but not for trying to not get sick. Their money, your bad.

Several faithful members of our reunion committee met today and crunched some numbers. Looks like an interesting cast for a nice gathering in the 'burg. I currently have a spayed cat chasing a noisy ball through every room of this old house. My dawgs are in for the night with their Mama and ~~supper~~ tomorrow's lunch is cooked. My babygirl is in the bed enjoying fall break and working. One out of two is a blessing for her.

The crops are almost done except for the pecans and a few beans. When I think back over the years that farmers were paid federal tax dollars not to plant this or no-till that it makes me proud to be the member of a family who had the vision to keep agriculture alive and well. We're spending a kazillion dollars all over the globe doing just that thing. Give a man a fish... And f***reakin' term limits for Congress. Sheesh!

I'll keep ya'll posted about life on Pecan Lane ^j^

you don't scare me

2008-10-13T21:01:00.002-05:00

My friend Muffyn gave me a t-shirt several years ago to wear on Halloween. It's imprinted with that phrase, and I still wear it to sleep in, minus the sleeves. I've got one from work too that says "We Are Impressive", also a sleeveless model. Hell yes, we are. As a country we are beginning to see that less is more unless we happen to be absolutely spoiled rotten and then..well then. We're pissed off.

My friends and I talk a lot about politics and faith. Sometimes we disagree and other times it's a brawl, according to who's got the most impressive yet believable life story. In 2004 I was one of those who voted not for Kerry, but against Bush. Even though a great number of Americans did the same and it was a close race, Dubya got back in the oval office long enough for one girl to get married on our dime.

Pundits say that we should look ahead, and never back because..hey. The past is the past, right? Unless we're talkin' prophets..and a lot of 'em are false, we are to believe that the sky is falling 'cuz some banks have failed. I know for a fact that a lot of rich people are nervous. I am too, and not because I have a lot of assets to lose. I live on a farm that has been family owned for a hundred years or more. I've seen the seasons change from my house enough times to know that whatever today looks like, a cold front or tropical depression can change all of that in a heartbeat.

I'm not scared though. I reckon that's the faithful part of me.

^j^

dearly beloved

2008-10-12T15:22:00.003-05:00

My cousin's daughter who is one month older than Babygirl got married last night. She is a stunning beauty of a woman, much like her mother was at that age. She is the first of three in that litter to tie the knot, and the first girl. Like me, she has two bratty little brothers, and like me she adores them both. I don't dress up much, and neither does her Aunt Debbie but by golly we did for this occasion. I picked Mama up and we met Deb and Ronnie in the church parking lot and found our way to a pew close behind Aunt Granny.

The music was classical and the pianist accomplished at setting the mood for a promise like that. Mama can't see well, so I had to tell her that Zack and Nic were singing to their big sister. About that time Buddy and Carissa showed up with the first GREAT grandchild. His granny immediately grabbed him and proceeded to snuggle him near to death. I first noticed the tears shortly after that. Mom had a kleenex and it was all good.

It was at that point that I knew she was thinking about her late father and how much he would love this scene. They were two peas in a pod on most everything, including the band and ~~makin' shit~~ construction, not necessarily in that order. We spent lots of happy times together as children and then everybody started growing up and moving on with life. Things got busy and feelings got hurt.

I leaned over and whispered to Mama " Babygirl will NEVER go for something like this." She just smiled. Her reply was "You just never know." No, I guess you don't. Not 'til the fat lady sings.

^j^

if the hat fits, wear it

2008-10-10T15:00:00.002-05:00

That's the wording on the October page of the ever present Mary Engelbreit calendar that hangs above my desk at home. Her pictures make me smile and that's always a good thing. I've moved the 'puter to the dining room so that my bedroom is mine to sleep in. Had to do something.....the ganglion cyst is being puffed up with all that keyboard action.

I'll be working this weekend so if you need to see me, come to the ~~emergency room~~ sawmill and send a message through the tube system. Megan will get it :) I've seen some changes around our little cubicle and I must say, though unpleasant at times, the straight talkin' seems to have broken down some walls to where we compromise and figure out how to get things done without wearing down the horses. I'm too old for that shit, ya'll.

We got a good soaking rain that settled the dust nicely and cooled us down a bit. Trees are beginning to change colors. Fall is finally here. And you know what?

It's my favorite ^j^